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Der Vaterland
Hey listen up, stand to attention
The father's a bad mother of invention
Worse than detention, badder than Latin declension
Here to
talk and walk you to the bridge
Across my
g-g-generation
Makes yours
look like a s-s sad relation
You want me
to tune to a station that plays that jam
Take a
brain scan, I'm the scam, I'm the Royal scam
You can't
even spread jam
Cos I've
got the bread, man, in fact I even own the bread van
So go
ahead, talk about your new skank, handbag, punk, funk,
Jamaican skunk
And that 2
beat groove
I could
play the Stairway to Heaven solo when you were two!
Now I'm
supposed to be fazed, dazed and outraged
With all
the cussing and fussing
From that
M&M chap
Well I can
say shit, ass, dick and balls too
You f***ing
twat
So don't
take the piss and diss me
Show me
some respect and miss me
Tell me you
need to be young and black to rap?
Well, I'm
nearly 50 and fat so screw that!
Hey all the
young dudes
Living my
life over
Boogaloo
dudes
We're only
rock and rollers
Hey,
used to be I was a sex machine too
Before you
turned me into the not-so-lean money machine that feeds you
Hay maker
to the piss-takers, easy A‑grading
Sex and
tex-mexed, disaffected, injected, pre‑selected and perfected
You gotta
new record - I broke it
Gotta new
pipe - I smoked it
Got wood -
I solid-oaked it
So tell me
when you can buy what you can afford like me
Don't need
to drive a Ford like me
Walk, talk
and pork the sword like me
Play off 24
like me
And don't
try to appease my heebie jeebies
With the
Micky D's freebies and MTV's
Wake up
please and smell the coffee, read the tea leaves
Hey all the
young dudes
I'm
watching you
Living my
life over
Boogaloo
dudes
Me and you
We're all
just rock and rollers
Break: Hey
you all telling me this, telling me that
Telling me
cramming a lot of words
Into a
sentence is where it's at
Can't make
up my mind if it's you talking
Or I'm at
the race track
And what's
that about lyrical gansters
People
called Biggy and Tupac
What's that
- 4 cans short of a 6 pack?
And
something about female dogs getting smacked?
Well I don't
need to call myself a nigger
To be bigger
than Biggy or get jiggy jiggy
With an ass
and shaky titties
Can Biggy
take you to the bridge?
Can Biggy
take you to the bridge?
3. I see
you watching Ozzy on the MTV
I see you
watching Ozzy on the MTV
You want
money for nothing but chicks and nothing come free
And Ozzy
doesn't bite bats no more and try to kill himself
And Alice's
dead babies have grown up
Just like
you - taking things off my shelf
And me, I
don't smoke, I only mow grass
Row fast,
blow my abs out
Wrestling
with my jeans trying to get my ass out
Buying from
the catalogues
Watching
travelogues
Going to
Prague and Tallin with my friends to check the candy floss
It's my
birthday, it's my birthday
Don't want a
hug or "love you daddy" on a mug
I wanna
Harley
I wanna
Harley
I wanna fit
inside the pants I used to wear
When I went
to parties
I'm the
balls of the dog
But you
can't admit it
If it's too
hard to swallow
Spit it
You want me
to fill - your bucket
You can't
get a girl - get lucky
You think
I'm a complete - muppet
You want
more money - f**k it
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